New Goals, Old Fears.

I was sitting in a bath ceremony early this morning when I asked the question,

"What am I holding onto?"

I replied to myself, "Fear."

Although I've come a long way, there is still a way to go.

I have moved forward from fears that once stopped me from doing the things I have wanted to do. I am now in a space where I once prayed for.

I have accomplished the things I set out to accomplish, and here I am now, ready for the next level, but stuck on some fear.

I've said this before, and I'll say it again, pregnancy and postpartum quantum-leaped me into another level I didn't know I would jump into so quickly.

I did the work and have seen and done many things I am incredibly proud of. However, in this new 'level' are new fears.

I have many new things I desire in life. New goals, new desires, but fear.

What I have recognized is that it's not necessarily a new fear; it's some of the old ones that creep up as I begin to do the new things I desire to do.

This morning, as I sat in ceremony, I had a vision of a past life and ancestral trauma. I felt strong emotions come through.

Fear of punishment, fear of rejection, fear of being me came flooding in.

It was as if I were being punished for sharing my truth, sharing knowledge, and sharing sacred wisdom in this vision.

I allowed myself to speak life, love, and hope to my past self, letting her know she is safe, she is held, she is powerful, and there is nothing to fear. I reminded her that it is okay to be all of me, even if it's different than what others are accustomed to. I let her know it is safe to use her voice, share truth, and share the love that is to be shared.

These new fears are not new at all; they have come up in the past.

I have moved forward with them in my awareness, and I will continue to hold myself in reverence as I navigate through these same fears I once thought I had transmuted and let go of.

Healing is not linear. I see it as a spiral that just continues to penetrate deeper and deeper, and when there are old wounds I thought I had healed from, I know that this is only a deeper part of the wound. A deeper knowing, innerstanding, and wisdom is coming forth.

I will continue to speak and share in the ways my soul desires to express.

I will continue to move through the fear, and in this moment, I invite you to take inventory of your fears. What is stopping you from doing the things that you desire in this life?

✨✨✨

Sit with yourself today.

Close your eyes.

Ask yourself this question...

"What is stopping me from moving forward in life?"

Write down all that comes up, or just take mental note of the thoughts that come in...

Ask yourself, "What am I afraid of?"

Talk to yourself, be with yourself, be with your thoughts and your emotions.

So much is revealed when you just take the time to be with you. <3

I love you! I'm rooting for you!

-Zuleica Vasquez 🌹

Integration; Dismantling, relearning, and embodying 🌹

Divine Remembering Group Medicine Ceremony July 2025 with Isabel Garcia

RED FLAGS >> This post will either open your eyes or offend your ego. Both are doing exactly what they need to do 🚩🚩🚩

I have said this for years: there's no point in sitting with the medicine or attending every ceremony you see available if you do not do the real work that comes after what the ceremony or medicine has revealed.

It's an 80/20 rule. 80% is the innerwork, shadow work, trauma work, subconscious work, while the 20% is ceremony. Big things come up when you sit with the medicine, whatever medicine it is that you have chosen to partner with: this can be breathwork, meditation, shamanic medicines, etc. and if you do not know what to do with this energy, it will remain stuck. It will simply come to the forefront and will remain there until you do something with it. Which is why integration is the most important work after such sacred ceremonies.

I spent all of July facilitating Integration Sessions for my ceremony attendees. 97% of the women who attended had never sat in a gathering, ceremony, or especially in a medicine one.

This told me two things... 1. "These women are called to wake TF up," and 2. "Teach them how to hold their selves", because there's only about 1% of the entire population that know how to truly hold space for their selves. Who knows how to feel what they are feeling, not judge it, NOT RUN AWAY from it, and actually be there with their selves. 99% of people are running and will continue to run.

So, how did my integration sessions go?

Incredible.

Not one person said 'Oh yeah, I knew that was going to come up."

Every single one with whom I sat with during integration said they had no idea this was going to come up for them.

But that's what happens.

In life in general, we can set our intentions and go on about life, but sometimes what happens next is a total f*cking surprise.

So what can we do as things come up in life, as they do in ceremony?

You hold yourself just as you have been taught to hold yourself.

If you sit in a ceremony and there's no proper integration space or guidance for the next steps, that's a f*cking red flag!

Early on in my medicine journey, I had a conviction in my heart because the spaces we had held medicine ceremonies were not offering any real integration support.

It almost felt like we just said, "Okay, back into the big world you go."

And as for my mama heart, I could not take it.

It was not aligned with what my soul came here to do.

I would often think to myself, "Okay, now what?"

What do these people do with all that they just experienced in the ceremony?

I knew what to do because back then, I was already an internationally accredited and certified healing facilitator trained in guiding women through their deep trauma work, but what about the people who had no fucking idea what trauma work even was? Then what?

This is where I recognized people needed much more than just a ceremony. There is a whole ass awakening happening to the women who have never done this kind of work.

I recognize it is not my job to handhold but I've made it my job to make sure these beautiful women know how to hold themselves during this sacred time.

You don't need me, you need yourself.

But not everyone knows how to hold their selves.

Don't attend a ceremony if you're not ready to completely change your life.

Don't attend a ceremony if you just want to "experience what it feels like"

When we say it's a beautiful experience, we mean it, but it can get ugly, scary, or intimidating at first. You just need to stop running away from those feelings and hold yourself.

I live my life as if every day is integration because for me, it is.

For me, each day that I learn something new about myself, I practice either letting it go or embodying it. I take it for what it is and grow from it.

There's a dismantling that happens.

A relearning process occurs.

And then there's a sacred practice of embodying.

If you're not ready for that, don't sit in a ceremony with practitioners and facilitators who are here to do that kind of work.

We're not here for you to just experience something.

We're here to help you align with your authentic self. <3

__________

Side Note:

Phew, I've been wanting to get this off my chest for a bit, but needed to distinguish which was ego and which was my true self speaking. I am always rooting for your growth and evolution. There's no closing your eyes after they've been opened. If you are new to the work and have never practiced holding space for yourself, reach out to someone who has. Reach out to someone who has walked the underworld head-on and knew exactly how to get tf out of it. Reach out to someone who knows how to align with universal law to begin relearning a new way of being in harmony with the universe. Reach out to an expert, whether it be me or not. Just don't keep running from yourself. It's time to meet a deeper version of you.

I love you!

Side, Side Note: If you are ready for this kind of work, reach out as well.

I offer group and 1:1 sessions and ceremonies <3 -

Zuleica Vasquez | Master Spiritual Psychology Practitioner

Or check out my free resources

Freebie Vault | Zuleica Vasquez ✨

Tend to Your Garden🌹✨

I take daily walks around my neighborhood and love to look at other people's gardens.

Their beds, their layouts, their material and their flowers.

It all interests me.

Even the hidden aspects; I wonder what kind of mulch did they use? The soil? What bees and birds are attracted to that garden, those are literal questions that come to me as I pass by.

It all fascinates me.

And it makes me think of how true that is for me when I think of people's inner gardens.

The thoughts, the emotions, the seeds they consciously plant and the seeds that may have fallen on the garden at some point without their conscious consent.

I ask deep questions because I am genuinely interested in your story. I am interested in learning more about you and what has gotten you to where you are today.

What does it take to tend to a garden?

It takes a vision.

It takes a plan.

It takes action.

It takes planting and weeding.

It takes nurturing.

It takes patience.

It takes watering.

It takes trust.

And when we take the time, and practice patience with this garden, after some time, we see what has grown.

We see the physical manifestation of the work that was put in.

We see the seeds that we planted 6 weeks ago, sprout.

Then, grow and flourish.

And some die.

And it’s okay.

We simply clip it off and continue to nurture the garden.

So nurture your garden. 🌹✨

Weed out the limiting beliefs that sprouted though without your conscious consent.

Allow light, give water, give love to the parts of you that feel so small right now.

With time, those parts of you will also grow.

So tend to your garden. 🌹✨

Sow what you desire to reap.

Envision your life in your highest timeline.

Take charge.

Take responsibility for the things that fell into your garden long ago that can be picked up and removed now.

So love on your garden. 🌹✨

Allow inspiration to flow.

Look around with the knowing that your garden is growing and it will never look the same as anyone’s else, but it is your garden, and it is beautiful.

It is beautiful in the beginning stages, and it is beautiful in the in between.

You will one day look back and see all the growth that has occurred and will only have a memory of what your beginning looked like.

So tend to your garden my dear, you are meant to flourish and grow. 🌹✨

I love you, I'm rooting for your growth and evolution,

-Zuleica Vasquez ✨🪶