New Goals, Old Fears.

I was sitting in a bath ceremony early this morning when I asked the question,

"What am I holding onto?"

I replied to myself, "Fear."

Although I've come a long way, there is still a way to go.

I have moved forward from fears that once stopped me from doing the things I have wanted to do. I am now in a space where I once prayed for.

I have accomplished the things I set out to accomplish, and here I am now, ready for the next level, but stuck on some fear.

I've said this before, and I'll say it again, pregnancy and postpartum quantum-leaped me into another level I didn't know I would jump into so quickly.

I did the work and have seen and done many things I am incredibly proud of. However, in this new 'level' are new fears.

I have many new things I desire in life. New goals, new desires, but fear.

What I have recognized is that it's not necessarily a new fear; it's some of the old ones that creep up as I begin to do the new things I desire to do.

This morning, as I sat in ceremony, I had a vision of a past life and ancestral trauma. I felt strong emotions come through.

Fear of punishment, fear of rejection, fear of being me came flooding in.

It was as if I were being punished for sharing my truth, sharing knowledge, and sharing sacred wisdom in this vision.

I allowed myself to speak life, love, and hope to my past self, letting her know she is safe, she is held, she is powerful, and there is nothing to fear. I reminded her that it is okay to be all of me, even if it's different than what others are accustomed to. I let her know it is safe to use her voice, share truth, and share the love that is to be shared.

These new fears are not new at all; they have come up in the past.

I have moved forward with them in my awareness, and I will continue to hold myself in reverence as I navigate through these same fears I once thought I had transmuted and let go of.

Healing is not linear. I see it as a spiral that just continues to penetrate deeper and deeper, and when there are old wounds I thought I had healed from, I know that this is only a deeper part of the wound. A deeper knowing, innerstanding, and wisdom is coming forth.

I will continue to speak and share in the ways my soul desires to express.

I will continue to move through the fear, and in this moment, I invite you to take inventory of your fears. What is stopping you from doing the things that you desire in this life?

✨✨✨

Sit with yourself today.

Close your eyes.

Ask yourself this question...

"What is stopping me from moving forward in life?"

Write down all that comes up, or just take mental note of the thoughts that come in...

Ask yourself, "What am I afraid of?"

Talk to yourself, be with yourself, be with your thoughts and your emotions.

So much is revealed when you just take the time to be with you. <3

I love you! I'm rooting for you!

-Zuleica Vasquez 🌹